Suspension

Self-referential and annoying though this is, I think a little self-conscious meta-bloggery might get me through this sort of fuzzy-headed block I have about my dissertation. What I've been doing since September: collecting "data" and assembling my basic argument. Data, in this case, means asking long-suffering couples to record their private conversations and then to submit themselves to an interview with me.

I finally finished all of that last week, and now I'm supposed to be in the infamous "writing" phase. It's tough. I feel like I've kind of lost sight of what it is I'm trying to say, and the lightest flicker of a distraction can send me off the path. Like, there's a new book related to my topic,and I tried to get it, and it seems to be unavailable, and so this creates some kind of synapse gap in my ability to think about the topic. I *do* work in bursts, but the bursts aren't firing quickly enough for the time pressure I'm under.

So. That's where it is. I'm kind of floaty, and I feel like I keep head-butting into a big foamy block like those things football players slam their shoulders into in practice. Move forward -- SLAM. Fall to the ground on my ass. Hop up. SLAM. Distraction by scrabulous mania, holiday gifts, travel booking, navel-gazing about my relationship, checking BBOD to see if they're finally broadcasting the vital two episodes of Torchwood we missed, intense conversations with those among my compatriots who are near a computer and equally divertible during the day.

That's me, now. Floating and angstful. Now, back to waiting for UPS to arrive.